5 minutes...... oldwrench tries story telling

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oldwrench
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5 minutes...... oldwrench tries story telling

Post by oldwrench » August 31st, 2009, 11:37 pm

I decided to try my hand at writing. I liked the old rpg 5 min, so I am trying to make a story out of it. I figure enough of the original player are gone so I won't get to much hate mail for changing their characters. After many hours of typing...... I'm really slow...... and retyping, and editing, and fussing cause it just never looks as good as I imagined it. Here is chapter one. Please let me know if you like it..... or don't like it...... or hate it...... if your comments aren't appropriate for the forum, you can always pm them to me.



5 Minutes

Colonel Daniel Hellwind sat at his desk in the operations room of the White Magic class mobile suit carrier, the CWS Krikav. He finally had his own command, the 427th light armored. Twelve mechs, armored suits, in three battle groups. Each group had one light Firefly, two Thunderbirds, and one heavy Lancer. There weren’t any specialized groups in a small command like this, each group had to be an independent unit. It wasn’t quite the big command he had dreamed of, but..... oh well.
Dan finished his final check list. They were about ready to move out, the mechs were aboard, all the stores and spares checked. The ship's personnel were aboard. They were going to be short one mech pilot, he hadn’t made it to the shuttle with the other pilots. Dan had checked into it, seems his travel orders were screwed up, he was to late getting to the right moon base. This was supposed to be a easy mission, so one pilot short shouldn’t be a problem.
Dan opened the file of his pilots records, maybe it was just as well the kid didn’t make it, this was going to be tough enough to fit together. Someone must be trying to make things hard for him, and he knew of a few who might want to. This had to be the most mismatched bunch of screw ups and rookies they could find.
He looked once more at the personnel files. Three captains, Each piloting a Thunderbird. Captain Aidan Pryde, Green Giant group, the most experienced of the group, excellent tactician, good gunner, excellent leader. This is his third command. There was a problem though, after recovering from injuries taken in the raids on the pirate bases, there’s been some questions. At times Aidan seemed to be slow to respond, like his mind was somewhere else........... Dan was glad to have Aiden in his command, they’d worked together before, and he knew Aiden was a good soldier.
Under Aiden, in the Green Giant group, rookie Megumi Yamato, first lieutenant, pilots the second Thunderbird, the forces most iconic mech, well armed and armored, they did the most fighting.. She’s a martial arts expert, excellent piloting skills, very quick, excellent at close combat, a bit hesitant, needs to be directed......... Second lieutenant John Crichton, pilots a Firefly, fastest and lightest of the mechs, usually used for hit and run, and recon work. An experienced fighter, he has the problem of being too aggressive, over extending his equipment. Dan sighed as he looked at the comments.. John would be a problem, he's a womanizer, insubordinate, mostly with women, and has been in the brig, for drunk and disorderly, all to often......... Geoffrey Harcourt, first lieutenant, another pilot he and Aiden had worked with. A regular British gentleman, he pilots the Lancer, the most heavily armed and armored of the groups mechs. They were best used as long range artillery. Jeff was a good soldier, experienced, not great at anything, but steady.

Captain Georgianna McFarlaine, leader of the Red Phoenix group, this is her second command. She’s a good pilot, good gunner, but her best weapon is her oversize particle beam saber, excellent at individual combat. Her Thunderbird is modified with a high power Minovsky drive and an I-field barrier shield. That must really drain the power supply, Dan thought. Comments on her performance, a bit weak in tactics, not a good team player, often too aggressive and controlling. Dan shook his head, she didn’t sound like the best leadership candidate.
Under her command, second lieutenant Kaze, no other name, a rookie, pilots a Firefly, very good with a lightweight beam saber, good gunner, poor at tactics, good at following orders. He grew up as part of one of the para-military communes....... First lieutenant Louis Herman, a veteran Thunderbird pilot. He’s good as a gunner but poor at close in fighting. Not very independent, works best with a close group. Dan sighed, he isn’t going to get that in a small command like this........ Last is second lieutenant Arisa Higgins, a rooky Lancer pilot. She was top at her class in almost everything. A good pilot, but what was a girl from her social status doing here in a mech? People with her family money usually ended up as ships officers, in the big capital ships, not in a little carrier like this, and not fighting in a mech.

Captain Dominic Torres, Blue Dragon group, an experienced fighter, this is his first command. An excellent gunner, damn...... did he actually shoot down that many drones with just his cannons? Hmmm, excellent at tactics, but the comment says “unconventional”. The comments also say he’s a maverick, doesn’t like formality, he's been disciplined a few times. Dan grinned, he knew what that was like. Just what I don’t need, he thought, a joker in the hand.
Under his command, first lieutenant Rose Kerlov, veteran Thunderbird pilot, good gunner, excellent at close combat using two short beam sabers. She’s been with Torres on all her combat missions and is loyal to him. I wonder if there’s something going between the two of them? ….......Then there’s second lieutenant Benjamin Wolfman, a rooky, pilots a Lancer H, the heaviest armed of the mechs, according to this, he's the best rail gun shot they’ve seen. Not good with tactics and it says he’s slow. Wonder what they mean by that, slow moving..... or thinking?
Torres will just have to do without his Firefly. He looked at the profile. Maybe it’s for the best, he would just add more problems........ Maybe I should have Rose pilot the firefly? No, better to do without the speed and recon than have a pilot unfamiliar with it. They'll have to rely on the other groups. Good thing this mission is just a milk run.
The Colonel got a call from the ships controller, Yuki, “Sir, the last pilot has just arrived.”
Dan’s head snapped up, “what? How did he get here?”
“The pilot rode aboard a supply shuttle that was bound for the Eisenhower. He jumped from the shuttle to the Krikav as the shuttle passed by.”
“Those shuttles aren’t equipped to transport personnel. How could he manage that?”
“He was wearing a maintenance eva suit, sir.”
Dan shook his head, the boy must be crazy. Where did he get a maintenance suit? Those suits only have maneuvering thrusters. If he’d missed his jump there’s no telling where he would have ended up, and the takeoff must have been really rough. "Yuki, send an ensign to bring him here.”
“I have already done so sir.”

Colonel Hellwind looked at the personnel file on his terminal. First Lieutenant Chad Ross, Firefly pilot. An excellent pilot rating. That was a bit strange, he’s a grounder, and they don’t usually make very good pilots. They think in two dimensions. Most pilots were either spacers, born in the space colonies or the asteroid mines, or had lived most of there lives in space. Not many who lived all their lives on a planet made a good pilot, much less one from the lower levels of the dome cities. It says he’s a fair gunner, but very good at individual close fighting. He has training in recon work. They also comment that he has problems with authority, especially with women, he’s been disciplined several times, mostly for fighting. Worst is, he was brought up before a court-martial, but the charges were dropped in the middle of the trial. Wonder what that was about?

Lieutenant Chad Ross worked at peeling off the maintenance suit. He was keenly aware of the techs gathered around staring at him. Damn, He thought, they could at least help me with this thing. After all the crap I went through to get here, I didn’t think they were going to cycle me through the air lock. You’d think I was a ghost or something.
As Chad finished removing the suit, a young ships officer came up to him.
“Lieutenant Ross, sir.” the ensign said, “I have orders to escort you to the colonels office.”
“Ya, right,” Chad replied, “just lead the way.” I suppose I’ll get my ass bit for not being on the shuttle. They’re trying to screw me up, trying to make me fail. But I showed them this time, I made it anyway.

Colonel Hellwind glanced up at the young man as Chad entered the office. The boy was a bit less than 2 meters tall, wiry thin, dark brown hair, steel grey eyes. He has an angry look, Dan thought. So, he has problems with authority, we’ll see.
Dan didn’t look up, “You’re late, pilot.”
“Yes sir.” Chad snapped. He wanted to say more, but held back. They'd let him know, in no uncertain terms, that if he messed up this time, there would be no reprieves. Now it comes, he thought, no matter that it wasn’t my fault, I’ll get ripped anyway.
Dan glanced through the papers the young man had set on his desk. He'd gotten a message from command that an error on Lieutenant Ross’s travel orders would make him to late for the shuttle. He really hadn’t expected the pilot to make it to the Krikav. He had to give him points for determination and resourcefulness. He looked up at Chad's hard grey eyes. So, the boy's defiant, he expects to be reprimanded, but at least he didn’t make excuses. Perhaps there’s some hope.
“You’re part of Blue Dragon group, you're under captain Torres. Ensign, show Lieutenant Ross to his quarters.”
Dan watched as the ensign had to almost push the startled looking Chad out the door. Welcome to my command, pilot. Dan looked back at the personnel file. The boy was either insane, trying to get here like that, or foolishly daring. Either way, couple that with his anger and you have someone who could be dangerous.
"Yuki, get me any information you can find on the court-martial trial of Lieutenant Chad Ross." Dan put his head down in his hands. Who had stuck him with this mess? Was someone actually out to ruin him on his first command?
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Re: 5 minutes...... oldwrench tries story telling

Post by Zeratul2k » September 1st, 2009, 4:03 am

I see you made a few changes since last time I read it. Now that you posted it I guess that means this is the final version, eh? Looking good so far!
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Re: 5 minutes...... oldwrench tries story telling

Post by Hiki » September 1st, 2009, 7:56 pm

:love: Looks good~! :thumb: I'm glad you explained all those machines because else I would've never known what they were XD
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Re: 5 minutes...... oldwrench tries story telling

Post by Dinky » September 4th, 2009, 8:01 pm

Nice work. Liking the world and characters so far!
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Re: 5 minutes...... oldwrench tries story telling

Post by Sakura » September 5th, 2009, 7:55 pm

I stopped reading after the "Colonel"... :pif:
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Re: 5 minutes...... oldwrench tries story telling

Post by Sakura » September 7th, 2009, 10:24 am

Meowiez at main page :thumb:
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Re: 5 minutes...... oldwrench tries story telling

Post by oldwrench » September 8th, 2009, 5:15 pm

That story is just too funny, Sakura......... Tell the truth, were you one of the writers?

I'll try to do better in my second chapter. Spent the weekend helping daughter and son in law tear out old bathroom and start remodeling process. Lots of work there, and that cast iron tub was really heavy to move. Hope to get time to write soon, I now have the shop bookwork to do.
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Re: 5 minutes...... oldwrench tries story telling

Post by oldwrench » September 14th, 2009, 7:38 pm

So, on to chapter two. we get to meet a few of the characters. Ok, it's not much, but I'm trying my best. sighs

5minutes Ch2

Georgianna looked around the officers lounge. It was her first tour on a White Magic class ship. The room was small, well, so was her command. Her last command was twelve mechs, now she only had four. Ya, she’d had some problems, and she was pretty sure she knew why she had been brought before a review board. One guy in her command had caused her trouble at every turn........
Georgianna walked up to Dominic. “Hey, Dom, so you finally made captain. Hi Rose, you still hanging around with this lost cause? “
Dominic laughed, “I see you’re as sweet as ever Georgi. Nice to see you again too.” Rose chuckled.
Georgianna grimaced at the name, “So what kind of group did you get? I have a couple rookies and one vet. The two over there are in my group. The Asian kid is a rooky, the other is a vet.” She pointed to where Kaze and Louis were sitting at a table. “The other is a female, but she isn’t in the room.”
Dom looked, “I have two rookies too, and Rose. Seems Aiden, only got one rooky, and he’s the most experienced of us. Doesn’t seem fair.”
“Except,” Georgianna replied, “He’s got Crichten......and a rooky girl, that’s worse than two rookies.”
“Who?” Dom asked.
“Ah,” Rose agreed, “I know what you mean.”
Dominic wondered what they were talking about.
“You’re only going to have one rooky anyway, Dom.” Geogianna grinned, “I heard one of the pilots wasn’t on the shuttle. Seems he's one of yours.”
Dominic looked surprised, “You’re sure....... darn, I didn’t need that.”
Georgianna laughed, “ Not a good record, Dom, you haven’t even gotten into combat and already have an MIA. I hope this isn’t an omen for you.” Georgianna turned away, “Keep him out of trouble, Rose.”
Rose watched her walk away, “I think she’s right, I think there were only eleven pilots on the shuttle.”

Half way across the room, Georgianna was stopped by an Asian girl. Megumi looked up at the taller woman, “Captain, I’m looking for the Green Giant group.” Megumi bowed to Georgianna, “I am first lieutenant Megumi Yamato. Are you captain Pryde?”
Georgianna almost laughed when the girl bowed to her. These kids from the Asian colonies were so formal. “Not me,” she replied, I’m Georgianna McFarlaine, my group is the Red Phoenix.”
“Megumi, that’s a nice name,” came a voice from behind Georgianna. She turned and saw John Crichton close behind her. “Hi there sweetheart,” John said to Georgianna, “bet you been missing me.” He gave the girls his best smile. “This mission is looking good for old Johnny boy. Too bad I’m not in your group, Georgianna.” John’s eyes wandered up and down the tall woman.
“You’re just lucky you aren’t, Crichton. Now just get lost.”
“Aw, don’t be that way, captain, you know you don’t mean it.. Now Megumi, I’m in Green Giant group too. Our captain is old man Aiden, over there.” John pointed to where Aiden and Jeff were sitting. I’ll take you over and introduce you.” John wrapped an arm around Megumi and steered her toward captain Pryde.
“But what about captain McFarlaine?” Megumi asked.
“Oh, don’t worry, Megumi, I won’t let her get lonely. There’s plenty of old Johnny to go around.”
Megumi giggled, she thought John was quite amusing. “Captain Pryde doesn’t look old,” she mused.
John laughed, “he’s only a few years older than me, but he has a lot of mission experience, so he’s the old man of the pilots.”
Georgianna turned to stalk out of the room. Damn that Crichton, she thought, what a perv, pawing all over another girl......... And on the shuttle, he was all but wrapping himself around that small girl. She frowned as she left, damned lecher.


Chad entered the lounge, maybe he could get something to eat. He hadn't eaten since he left earth yesterday. Chad surveyed the room looking for captain Torres. The first captain he saw was a tall woman, she was only seven or eight centimeters shorter than he was, and probably out massed him. She had red hair and sharp green eyes. Chad thought she could have been a warrior queen from one of the old movies. He watched her talking with a smaller, dark haired, Asian girl and a guy who was about the same size as the captain. As the man walked off with the Asian girl, Chad noticed the black look on the captain's face.
Oh crap, Chad thought, she’d better not be Torres, I can’t take another woman’s stupidity. They might as well throw me in the brig now. Chad watched her walk away, she looks like one mean bitc................
“Hey, you must be Ross!” Whap! Chad was almost knocked off his feet.
Chad spun, fists clenched, to see who had hit him from behind. “Ya, I’m Ross, what’s it to you..........” Chad stopped, the guy behind him was a mountain. He was nearly a head taller than Chad and probably twice as wide, with a wild stack of straw blond hair and smiling blue eyes.
The big guy’s smile didn’t even dim.. “Great, we’re roomies.” He said, “ We’re both in Blue Dragon group. I’m Ben, Ben Wolfman. That must be our captain over there, with the pretty lady. Let’s go check them out.” Before Chad could say anything the Ben pushed him toward the table where Dominic and Rose were sitting.
“You must be captain Torres.” Ben said
“That’s right, Dominic Torres, just call me Dom, and this is first lieutenant Rose Kerlov.” Dang, Dom thought, when did they start recruiting giants? The guy’s a refrigerator with a head.
“Great, glad to meet you captain Dom, and Rose.” Ben replied as he plopped down onto a chair. “I’m Ben Wolfman, I’m a Lancer pilot..”
Rose laughed, “that’s obvious. I don’t think You’d fit in anything smaller.” She could hardly believe that chair could withstand Ben’s huge bulk.
Ben smiled, “Don’t know mam, never tried...... Oh, this here is Chad Ross. He’s in our group too.” He looked at Chad. “ Hey, sit down and join the group, buddy.”
Chad looked over the other two as he sat down. The captain was a medium height, but solidly built man. He had dark brown hair and dark brown eyes. Rose had short cut light brown hair and hazel eyes. She was a bit shorter than the captain, and she was well built........ the word voluptuous came to mind.
Dominic was a bit surprised, He’d seen Ben on the shuttle, you couldn’t miss the guy, so it must have been Chad that wasn’t supposed to be here. “I heard you weren’t going to make it, Chad, I didn’t see you on the shuttle.”
“I wasn’t,” Chad replied, wary that he might still be reprimanded.
“I suppose somebody screwed up your travel orders, darned idiots. How did you make it to the ship, then?”
Chad hesitated, a bit surprised, and still wary “I ..... got lucky and hitched a ride.”
“Well, I’m glad you did make it, I didn’t want to start my first command one mech short.”
Rose looked over the two new group members. “This is nice,” she said, “we can get to know something about each other. I always think it’s good to know as much as you can about the people you're in combat with....... Dom and I both come from the orbiting farming colony AG-6. I met him when our schools played zero-g games against each other. We both decided to join the military to try to get away from the farming business for a while. We just happened to sign up at the same time, and we keep ending up assigned to the same battle groups......... So, where are you from, Ben?”
“I’m from the asteroid mining colony out by CS-31a.” Ben told them, “ My family has a pretty big stake out there. That’s where I learned to fire a rail gun, been operating one since I was a little guy.”
Rose chuckled, “That must have been a long time ago.”
“Hey, not that long,” Ben replied, “I’m not that old.”
Rose laughed, “ It was just a joke..... big guy.”
“A joke....... huh?” Ben looked puzzled for a moment, then a big grin cracked his face. “Oh, I get it.” Ben laughed out loud. “I did get big fast..... But I learned how to sling ore loads with the rail gun when I was a little kid. You got to hit the receiver at the refining plant every time or you lose the load. Dad wouldn’t stand for that. That’s why they put me in a Lancer though, cause I was good with a rail gun. It’s how I got my call sign, bullseye.”
Dominic sat up straighter, “ You’re bullseye? I heard that you took out two drones that were beyond the range of your targeting system. That’s nearly impossible.”
Ben smiled, “If I can see em, I can hit em. That’s what all that practice with the rail gun taught me...... What’s your call sign?”
“They call me gunner,” Dom stated, “and Rose is queen...... queen of blades. She’s really deadly with two shortened beam sabers.”
“Dom got his call sign by shooting down fourteen high speed drones with just his cannons during one of the war game maneuvers.” Rose beamed, “He’s the fastest trigger man out there.”
“Geeze,” Ben's eyes got big, “That's some shooting. I'm glad we're on the same side.”
Dominic looked over at the young man who had been quietly watching them. “You haven’t said much, Chad, where are you from?”
Chad looked warily around the table. It was always dicy when you joined a new gang. Dominic and Rose had obviously been together before, and someone of Ben’s size never had a problem being accepted. Chad had nothing special to offer the group, would they accept him?
“I’m from Detroit......... Michigan,” was his short answer.
After an awkward moment, Rose spoke up. “That's one of the big domed cities on the Earth. Detroit's’s a big industrial capital, isn’t it? What kind of business is your family in?”
Darn, Chad thought, these people all come from good families, and rich places. How can I tell them I come from the lowest gutters of Detroit?............ Chad looked down at the table, “Ah, we were in the used car business........ sort of.”
“Oh,” Rose replied, “ did your family have a dealership, or a big car lot? I heard that personal cars are still a big industry on the earth.”
“No.....no, it wasn’t that. We were, um, more into used parts.” Why does she have to push it, Chad thought, is she trying to make me admit I stole cars for a living? It’s hard to live in the slums, there’s nothing to do.
“So you had one of the recycling plants?” Rose continued questioning Chad. “I’ve read about the efforts to recycle all the materials. Did you recycle more than just cars, or was your business limited to them? Ow.
Dominic kicked Rose under the table. He'd noticed the dark look on Chad’s face as Rose questioned him, and got a bad feeling that he knew why. He’d seen news from earth, of the stolen cars and of gang activities. Dominic had heard rumors of a “dirty” officer, a grounder, from the “wrong side of the tracks”. He had to change the subject.
“So you’re from earth, Chad, we don’t see many pilots from the home planet. What’s your call sign?” Dom asked.
Chad started to answer, but hesitated. He’s been called a few things, mostly not very complimentary. He hadn't been accepted well by the other cadets in training. Chad preferred the call sign, Tiger, but had heard the Asian boy tell the other pilot that it was his call sign.
Ben quickly answered, laughing “I know what it is, it’s Crash. Most of the Lancer pilots know of Crash Ross.”
Dominic looked puzzled, “Huh?”
Ben smiled, “You haven’t heard of him, he’s the guy that took out a Lancer by ramming it with his Firefly, in the last war games. Damn near killed the both of them, but saved his base. Totally crazy.”
“She didn’t leave me any options.” Chad mumbled almost inaudibly.
“That was you!” Rose jumped in. “That’s right, Captain Ross. I remember reading about it, you were court-martialed, but the charges were dropped. I see they busted you down a rank. That seems.........
Chad quickly got up and turned to leave. “They sent a replacement mech for me, I’ll go check it out.” Chad quickly left.
Dominic shook his head, “I don’t think you made a friend there. It seems you poked a sore spot. Bringing this stuff up could be dangerous. Maybe we should let him come up with his own call sign. It would be bad to have problems in the group.”
Rose looked down, “I was just going to say he got a bad deal.”
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Re: 5 minutes...... oldwrench tries story telling

Post by Hiki » September 15th, 2009, 5:08 pm

What does "MIA" stand for? Missing in action..?

Very nicely written 8D
I don't mind it not being too long, because else I'd lose my concentration :swt: (I have a short attention span XD)
I can't wait to read more!!
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Re: 5 minutes...... oldwrench tries story telling

Post by Sakura » September 16th, 2009, 12:23 pm

I bet it's an abbreviation for "MIAW" *purrr*
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